Too Hard Read online

  “Oh god, don’t do that,” I say, standing there in shock. “I can’t handle tears.”

  “It’s okay. I’ve got her,” Harlow says, and I watch as she puts her arm around her cousin and they go to the couch.

  I’m unsure of what to do, but I want to run after Sean and kick his ass, but I don’t want to leave them alone. It takes a few moments, but Harlow gets Nellie under control and then she tells me she’s going to go walk her to her car. I decide to go with them just to make sure he’s gone and grab some more supplies from my truck. I wait as Harlow tells her goodbye and Nellie leaves the parking lot to go to her mom’s place.

  I’m too invested in this situation and the best thing I could do would be to say I can’t take on the job and let the property manager take care of this. But as Harlow turns around and walks towards me I know that I’ll see this job through for her.

  “Thanks for not quitting,” she says as she closes the door to her apartment and I go into the kitchen.

  “I don’t think you need two contractors quitting on you in one day.” I wink at her to let her know I’m teasing, and the blush on her cheeks makes her look so fucking pretty.

  I have to turn around because it hurts too much to look at her when I know I shouldn’t have her. Sean is a prime example of why a man like me can’t be with a girl like her. She’s young and she’s got her whole life left to live. I’m stubborn and already set in my ways. I can’t change who I am, and I can’t give her the wild life she’s probably looking for. What if he’s right and she has daddy issues? Am I ready to be a father all over again? My cock thickens and I grit my teeth. At least I know where he stands on the decision.

  I grab my wrench again and get on my knees under the sink. I’ve got to unhook the water and remove the valves, so I turn over on my back and lie down on the floor with the upper part of my body inside the cabinet.

  “I guess since I don’t have any more backup, I really do need to watch you work.” Her voice is close and I look out of the cabinet to see her silky legs right next to me.

  She’s leaning up against the counter with her feet crossed, and her position squeezes her thighs together. Her shorts are still too fucking tight and this time there’s lace against her skin. It makes her look innocent and sweet but filthy. The bare strip of skin on her belly shows a soft roll I want to kiss. Why does her body tempt me in ways that no one else ever has before? I try to clear my head as I work and think about the task at hand. And try not to focus on what I’d do if I gave in to my desires. She’s probably got a nice view of my package right now and the thought of her looking at me while I’m hard has me growing to the point where I won’t be able to hide it much longer. I’m an old man and I can usually keep myself in check, but when it comes to Harlow everything is different.

  “So about what Sean said.” Her voice is soft and I like listening to her talk.

  “Yeah?”

  “Do you think he was right?”

  “About what?” I put down the wrench in my hand and grab the screwdriver from my toolbelt.

  “Do you think being attracted to an older man means you have daddy issues?”

  I swallow as I put down the screwdriver and reach for a smaller one. It’s still not the right size, but I know the one I need is in my tool box.

  “I think Sean is an asshole who is pissed your cousin wasn’t an easy lay, so he’s lashing out with his own insecurities. I think your ability to be intimate with someone doesn’t depend on your past but on how you’re going to treat that person and the respect you show them.” I give her the honest answer I would give my boys if they were to ask me the same question.

  “I like your answer.” I can hear the smile in her voice and my chest warms at her approval.

  “Can you hand me the flat head with the yellow handle right over there?” I’m trying to change the subject and keep things between us professional but don’t know if that will ever be possible with the way I feel about her.

  I point to the toolbox, and she walks over to it and bends down to get it. I should look away, but I’m not a strong man and the sight of her thick thighs spreading as her jean-covered pussy peeks out from between them is enough to make me groan. She looks back at me over her shoulder and I pretend to go back to work and act like I wasn’t just watching her like a creep.

  I keep my eyes on the pipe overhead when suddenly I feel her move on either side of my waist. I look down and watch her slowly lower herself on top me and put her hot pussy on my dick. Her knees are snug on either side of me as she holds out the screwdriver in her hand. Her mouth is open and her tits are spilling out of the top of her shirt that’s hanging off of her. If she rocked on me a little I’d cum right on my stomach. Her eyelids are heavy and she leans forward, putting more pressure where I need it most.

  “Is this what you want?”

  Chapter Seven

  Harlow

  My heart races in my chest. I don’t know how I came up with the courage to sit down on him. I was thinking about it since he lay down to get under the sink and I shamelessly kept checking him out. I know my mind should be other places, but my cousin told me Butch was one of the good ones and to get my man. I’m not sure how to go about that, but for some reason sitting on him was what came to mind.

  I’m pretty sure he’s into me because I caught him sneaking glances at me. His eyes lingered on my bare skin and it gave him away. It’s something Nellie told me to watch for even though she said she couldn’t get a read on Butch. I might have given away that I was trying to do things to make him look at me by bending over like I did. He isn't that great at pretending he isn't looking, but I guess we both suck at faking it. I don’t want to fake anything when it comes to Butch.

  “Harlow,” Butch warns as he wraps his hand tight around the screwdriver. I don’t let go and he doesn’t try any harder to pull it from my hand.

  I lick my dry lips and wonder what he tastes like. More than anything I want to move my hips so I can feel his hard length against my clit. God, he’s big, but he looked like he would be. Now that I have my legs spread over him I can feel every hard inch and I’m not sure he’ll fit inside me. The idea of trying has me wiggling against him and he lets out a low groan that rumbles through his body. His hard cock jerks against me and I shift against him, needing more friction. His cock seems to be enjoying it and he isn’t stopping me yet. I put my other hand on his hard chest because I need to brace myself. I want to grind down on him where I need it most.

  “Fuck,” Butch growls when I dig my fingers into his chest. He lets go of the screwdriver and his hands go to my hips to stop my motion. I whimper as the need to cum becomes unbearable. I’ve touched myself before, but this is so different and I can’t stop. “Does it ache?”

  I nod my head quickly. “It hurts.” This kind of pain is heaven and hell, but I don’t know how much longer I can survive.

  “I’ll fix it.” His big hands grip me harder and I gasp. “Only this once,” he adds with a warning.

  I want to tell him I already know I’ll need this again, but he starts to rock my hips for me and all thoughts drain out of me. I really wish I’d taken my shorts off before I sat down on him, but I couldn’t muster the courage. I already went without panties and the shorts are thin so I’ll have to make do.

  The roughness of his jeans on the inside of my thighs feels so good against my skin. It’s tough and raw like he is and I want to feel it all over my body. I bet his fingers would be rough against my clit, and I moan thinking about him putting his hand down my shorts.

  “You’re a dirty little girl. I know what you’re thinking.” My face heats and I wonder if he really does. Would he guess I’m thinking about his big dick fitting inside of me? Butch looks like a man who can read someone and know everything they’re thinking. “You think I should give you what you want just because you sat down on my cock?”

  “Please.” I rock with him and try to move faster but he has all the control. Oh god, I’m going to cum alread
y and I’m mad it’s so fast. I don’t want this to be over because he might hold true to his word of only doing this one time. I need to savor it but his dirty words have me grinding down harder.

  I drop the screwdriver from my hand and brace myself with both my palms on his chest. I know this orgasm is going to rock my whole world and I dig my fingers into his shirt as I feel it get closer. My eyes lock with his as I search for something. I’m so close but I need more and I don’t know why I’m not cumming. At first I thought I was going to go over instantly, but now I’m teetering on this edge and can’t go over it.

  “Good girl.” His words are my undoing and the unknown thing I was looking for was his approval. That’s all I needed for him to push me over the edge and send me into pure pleasure. I cry out his name and my whole body shakes as warmth swallows me. I close my eyes. I fall into it and let it take me over as a peace I’ve never felt blankets me.

  “You okay?” Butch’s hands move up and down my back, rubbing me softly. His voice is deeper now and I open my eyes to see we aren't in the kitchen. How had I not felt us move? I’m still in his lap and my thighs are straddling him but we’re on the sofa and my face is pressed to his chest.

  “Yeah.” I close my eyes again because I never want to move. We sit in silence together for so long I know I’m going to have to say something, but I also know he’s likely going to bolt when I do. I pull back and look into his eyes, but his expression is unreadable. Not that I’m great with reading people, but I think he was jealous when he showed up this morning and saw another man at my place. I could be wrong though.

  “Are you going to leave now?” I blurt out. I hold my breath as I wait for his response and he closes his eyes, looking pained. I look at his broad chest and I lift up, trying to get off his lap.

  “I didn’t say you could move.” His hands hold me in place as my eyes meet his and my heart begins to pound.

  Chapter Eight

  Butch

  “Why are you trying to run from me?” I should let her do it, but my body won’t let me.

  “I don’t know.” She shrugs and looks away, but I’m not buying it.

  “You think I don’t want you?” I touch her chin and force her to face me.

  There are some advantages to being older, and that means less time for assumptions. Maybe if I were younger I’d play it cool or take my time, but I’ve been around long enough to know what I want when I see it. Harlow might not be what I should want, but I don’t have control over that. I sure as hell didn’t see her coming, so how could I have stopped it?

  “I’m worried that you’re looking for a reason to escape.” Her emotions are so raw that when she says this, I know it’s the truth deep down in her heart.

  “Nah, I’m just not ready for you to get up.” I smooth my hands down her back and around her ass. “I do need to go finish your kitchen, but I don’t want you rushing out of here because of what just happened.”

  I can see by the blush in her cheeks she was thinking about it.

  “You just said it was just once, so I didn’t know if maybe it felt like something you had to do.”

  My laugh rumbles low in my chest and for a second her brow furrows and she gets this cute little line between her eyes.

  “I don’t do anything I don’t want to. And if I could, I’d do that again and again.”

  “Why can’t you?” Her bottom lip pokes out a little and I feel her rock against me once again.

  “Goddammit, Harlow.” I lay my head back on the couch as I try to get myself under control. She rocks her hips again and I know I have to stop this. “Can’t you just take it for what it was? You needed me and I helped you out. But you don’t want to get tangled up with someone like me.”

  Her hands rub across my wide chest and I feel her pause over my hard nipples. “Why wouldn’t I want to get tangled up with someone like you?”

  “I’m old enough to be your daddy.” As soon as the words are out of my mouth I wish I could take them back. The sound of it on my tongue is too fucking good and I don’t want to give in to it.

  “It wouldn’t have to be like that.” It’s like she’s reading my mind. “But I don’t do stuff like that, ever.” Her cheeks blush again at the mention of what we did in the kitchen. “And I wanted you to know that I liked it, and I’d want to do it again if you did, too.”

  Her red hair is over one shoulder, revealing the freckles down her neck and across her collarbone. I want to kiss each one of them and take my time memorizing their patterns, but it’s not right. If she’s as innocent as I think she is then she doesn’t deserve to be saddled with someone like me.

  “I would be lucky to call you mine,” I say as I reach out and rub my thumb across her soft swollen lips that are begging to be kissed. “But for right now, we can’t.”

  Her gaze falls from mine and I hate that I’ve caused her any amount of pain. I pull her to me and stand up from the couch. Her feet hit the floor and she puts her hands on my stomach as she pushes away from me. I sigh when she turns around and walks to her bedroom and shuts the door. I want to run after her, but this is for the best. I shouldn’t have ever touched her to begin with. Not only because she deserves more, but because now I know what I’m missing and it’s tearing me apart inside.

  I decide to put my worry into my work and go into the kitchen. I rub a hand down my face and sigh loudly before I get busy. This is the only way I know how to cope when it comes to this kind of pain. I have to work to drown out all the voices inside me screaming to run after her and to get my head out of my ass. My chest hurts as I tear out her cabinet and cut sheetrock. I can’t even think about what this level of blue balls is doing to my cock, but that’s the least of my worries. The sad look in her eyes as she turned away from me is enough to haunt my dreams for eternity.

  Why did I have to take the call that night? Why did I have to walk in here and see her? Why did she have to be so fucking beautiful? These are the questions that play on a loop in my head as I move and sweat. Then the question that I’m scared to ask creeps in and it won’t let go. What if I gave in?

  It’s too fucking big inside me and I feel like I might split in half. I can’t believe after raising teenagers this is going to be the thing that kills me.

  Hours go by and I don’t stop working. The advantage to that is I’ve completed in a day a job that would usually take a week. If I were smart I would have dragged it out, but I was too focused on not thinking about what I feel, but it didn’t work. As soon as I stand back and use the bottom of my shirt to wipe away the sweat on my face it all comes crashing back.

  “Oh god,” I hear Harlow gasp, and I look over to see her staring at my bare stomach.

  I glance down to see my own stomach that’s long past the years of a six pack and now is a little soft around the middle. I’m hairy, too, and I wonder if she’s used to seeing young muscled guys with tanned skin and I hate that she might not like what she sees. I drop my shirt quickly and turn around to pack up my tools.

  “Has anyone ever told you that you look like Jason Statham?” Her tongue darts out and licks her bottom lip.

  I think the boys have mentioned it in passing when we’ve watched his movies, but I’m a little softer than he is. I shrug and don’t answer as she steps farther into the kitchen.

  “This looks so beautiful.”

  I want to tell her that it’s nothing compared to her, but I clench my jaw tight. I just need to get out of here and these feelings will stop. Never mind that I didn’t get a wink of sleep last night because I was thinking about her.

  “Thank you,” I say, grabbing my tool belt and slinging it over my shoulder.

  “Let me know where to send the bill. Normally Nellie handles all that, but I know this was an emergency.” She won’t look at me now and I can’t fucking stand it.

  “There’s no charge.” My voice sounds like I’ve never used it before. It’s low and rumbling in my chest and I want to scream so that she understands the pain I’m feelin
g right now.

  “I can’t do that, Butch.” The sound of my name on her lips is like a knife in the heart. “I appreciate everything and it wouldn’t feel right.”

  The way she says “everything” has so many more connotations than just the work in the kitchen.

  “Fuck,” I curse and drop my tools and go to her. I push her back against the wall and wrap my arms around her waist as my mouth falls on hers. She gasps and I run my tongue past her lips and give in to everything I’ve spent all day trying to stop.

  I’ve never been so uncontrolled in my life, but letting go and kissing her is the single greatest thing I’ve ever felt. It’s selfish and I can’t remember the last time I had that luxury. As a parent you always put yourself last and you do it because you love your kids. But Harlow has opened a set of doors that I thought were welded shut forever.

  “Have dinner with me,” I say as my kisses slow. I don’t stop, but I’m able to at least form a thought while my lips are on hers.

  Her hands snake up my shirt and I feel her fingers in my chest hair. I want to purr like a fucking panther at her touch on my skin and I have to lock my knees to keep from falling over. It’s been so long since I’ve been touched, but it never felt like this before.

  “Dinner?” she asks between kisses and I nod. “Tonight?” I nod again, and she smiles against my mouth. “Yes.”

  “Good,” I say, pressing my forehead to hers and trying to get myself under control. “I’m going to go home and take a shower. I’ll be back in an hour to pick you up.”

  “You’re not going to get cold feet on me again, are you?” she asks as she looks up at me through her lashes.

  How could I have ever thought I’d be able control myself when it comes to her?

  “One hour,” I confirm, and she nods as I grab my tools. I go to the door and I look her up and down one last time. “Wear a dress.”